[NOTE: Four things need clarifying. 1) Please DO NOT call GEICO. If you read the blog carefully, you'll see I hold no animosity toward them, only FreedomWorks. 2) Some readers seem to miss the fact that I did apologize for my words. Please read carefully. 3) I was NOT the gecko or the main vo tag announcer. That was a conflation by Matt Kibbe. 4) Comments have been closed because the server can't handle it, man. Please go here to enjoy a debate: HuffingtonPost Article. We now return you to your originally scheduled blog post.]
I never wanted to be political in this blog. It was supposed to be about my life in the biz. But my biz life and personal life were recently slammed together by a political bully group.
I hate bullies. It’s a mentality that starts with children and doesn’t evolve much more in quality or nuance through the adult years. Yes, this is going to be a huge blog post, kids. Get your Cheetos out.
The Nutshell:
FreedomWorks encouraged Tea Baggers to get me fired from GEICO because I left a complaint on their voice mail. (Press Release)
Oh yeah, I’m serious. Read on…
THE PLAYERS:
Me. An actor and voice over guy. Not famous (except in my mind). An American citizen. Impetuous. Likes long walks on the beach and nipple-twisting any idiots-in-power on occasion (but usually anonymously).
FreedomWorks. The conservative lobbying firm headed by the Ex-Republican House Majority Leader Dick Armey, which has been behind the Fox News sponsored tea bagging party movement that miraculously materialized the moment the Republican party lost the Presidential election on 11/4/08.
GEICO. A good insurance company owned by Warren Buffet’s Berkshire Hathaway that has hired me in the past.
Now, let’s follow the drama, shall we? The following blog is my opinion of what happened.
Prologue: The Rise of “Facts Averse” Tea Baggers
December 2007: Ron Paul supporters attempted to rent a blimp with “Google Ron Paul” on the side. It would fly to Washington, DC and then on to Boston, where they would dump tea bags into the Boston Harbor in a symbolic protest against the big-spending of…wait for it… Republicans! It failed due to lack of cash. But at least they knew their facts and where the blame should go.
February 2009: CNBC’s Rick Santelli proposed a Chicago Tea Party because he was ticked-off that distressed homeowners would be getting loan modifications (he’s all heart). Thus the new Angry “bring your guns” Tea Bagger Movement was stolen, er, born. And FreedomWorks Tom Gaithens helped organize the astroturf events. Since then, FreedomWorks has been the engine of the Tea Party, though they deny it — regardless of the facts.
Summer 2009: Dick Armey and Matt Kibbe aimed their angry mob at Health Care Reform.
Scene One: The Chaos
During the Health Care vote last month I was so upset by the slurs the Tea Party crowd angrily yelled at Barney Frank, et al, that I called FreedomWorks. (The last time I felt so compelled was when I saw Fred Phelps protesting an Iraqi soldier’s funeral with a “Thank God for IEDs” sign.)
During my impulsive call I:
- inquired as to their intelligence level
- wondered if they had a plan on how to spin the eventual news of one of their members turning violent and killing someone.
- left my phone number because I wanted someone to call me back and defend their Tea Party actions,
(The recording of my voicemail message can be heard in a special music video at the end of this blog.)
… Yeah, I know – STUPID! And certainly not constructive. But venting calmly with a twist of humor soothes my liberal soul. Plus, homophobia and racism are my Achilles heal. Unfortunately, in my haste, I used the phrase “mentally retarded” which, ultimately, drags me down to their level.
My first question was an unfortunate choice of words and I regret it. But my second question was the more pertinent one: How will they spin it when one of their members crosses the line and does something violent?
Now, my calling them, my choice of words, and leaving my number were all mistakes, and I accept responsibility for them. But what happened next was way beyond an appropriate response. It was downright sleazy, unethical and most likely illegal.
Scene Two: Matt Kibbe Gets His Freak On.
A week after the Health Care Reform bill passed, FreedomWorks errand boy Adam Brandon called me to verify my identity. I had already calmed down and couldn’t care less about debating their negative and insidious tactics.
Unbeknownst to me, Adam was recording the conversation (an illegal act depending upon which state he was calling from).
Then FreedomWorks researched my career.
Unfortunately, GEICO has been on their boycott list for pulling their ads from the Glenn Beck “I’m inciting sedition all the way to the bank” show last year. FreedomWorks discovered my connection with GEICO: I had been the announcer on their Celebrity campaign in 2007 and 2008. But they didn’t do anything for a few weeks…
Scene Three: When Teabaggers Attack
Then I posted on my FaceBook fan page that I had just recorded a new “Shocking News” campaign for GEICO.
The very next morning, Matt Kibbe (the president of FreedomWorks, not his errand boy) submitted a post to the conservative hate-blog-ring:
- deliberately conflating me with the “voice of GEICO”
- publishing my private voicemail message (an invasion of privacy)
- publishing the (possibly illegal) recording of their follow-up call
- included a badly photoshopped picture of the gecko… (seriously, their photoshop guy sucks.)
- published my home phone number
- published GEICO’s business line
- instructed readers to harass me and GEICO
Yup. You read that right, folks. This “Christian American” group published my home phone number and issued these glib instructions:
“Feel free to contact Lance. He was so kind to provide his number in the voicemail. Call his employer too… Let them know that you, in fact, are not a mentally retarded killer, but that you are now in the market for car insurance.”
I was inundated with calls and hang-ups. But they died after a day. GEICO may have received twice as much, but again, they died after a day.
However, GEICO made a quick corporate decision to drop me from the campaign ten hours after Matt Kibbe’s blog post appeared. Obviously not because of the magnitude of Matt Kibbe’s self-serving revenge campaign, as it was just a tempest in a teapot (pun intended), but because of the fear that has become synonymous with the Tea Bagger Party: The potential for the wackos of the party to get very loud and dangerous.
Finale: Washing Matt Kibbe’s Soul Out With Soap
I did not post my views in a large public forum. I did not publicly campaign against them. I left a calm (albeit impulsive) phone message ONCE. FreedomWorks responded with napalm.
It’s akin to me getting any one of the unblocked phone callers who harassed me fired from their jobs. I could try to do it, but an eye for an eye “leaves everyone blind”. Oh, and it’s kind of illegal… Tortious Interference, invasion of privacy and harassment. (If there are any lawyers out there who’d like to take this on pro bono, come and get it.)
Of course, Matt Kibbe could care less who I am. He just had a hard-on for the lizard and was more than happy to throw a stranger under the bus merely for some possible press… Yes, actions of an unethical opportunist. And of a writer bereft of any positive blog post ideas.
Mind you, I don’t blame GEICO. They shouldn’t have to take on an angry mob over an anonymous voice over guy. Besides, I do just fine outside of my GEICO campaigns. I also know that there are other big corporations out there that aren’t intimidated by the Tea Party Telemarketers and I’ll be on another national campaign soon…unless, of course, FreedomWorks decides to start a Hollywood blacklist.
Study Guide: FreedomWorks As Anger Machine
So how does FreedomWorks achieve “lower taxes, less government and more freedom” by getting me dropped from a GEICO campaign? They don’t. It’s simply the politics of destruction.
Matt Kibbe, Dick Armey and FreedomWorks are just using their followers as attack dogs in their beltway battles. They are an anger machine hellbent on undermining the administration — if the administration happens to be Democratic. They, like Glenn Beck, are flirting heavily with sedition.
Remember, this is the same group that passed out a handbook to members on how to disrupt town hall meetings on Health Care, essentially derailing democratic discourse. This “Tea Party mentality” culminated in a Health Care Reform weekend marked by:
- Barney Frank being called a f****t.
- Rep. John Lewis being referred to as a n****r.
- Rep. Emanuel Cleaver being spat upon.
- A weekend that saw Sedgwick County Democratic Party headquarters in Wichita vandalized.
- Rep. Tom Perriello’s home gas line to a propane tank being cut (his home address had been posted on a Tea Bagger’s FaceBook page).
- Death threats sent to Nancy Pelosi and Sen. Patty Murray.
- Me calling FreedomWorks and tweaking their nipple.
A Dedication: Matt Kibbe Can Kiss My Pimply Ass
In the past few days, I have been advised to just let it all happen to me – not to respond because “these guys cannot be reasoned with – they only know anger, hatred and destruction”. I also hear folks in the media say we should just ignore them and they’ll go away.
But here’s the rub: a portion of those members do have legitimate complaints and should be heard. (Hell, even I’m for abolishing income tax and going with a progressive VAT.) These people shouldn’t be ignored…though I would argue they should find a better organization to represent them. Or at least speak up and object to their group’s radical majority.
Unfortunately, the radical majority is provoked to racial paranoia and mob mentality by unethical Washingtonian operatives like Dick Armey and Matt Kibbe. If we do not confront these kinds of groups, we risk letting a hate movement gain a dangerous level of influence in our country.
“…there’s this vast echo chamber, and [these provocative words] go across space and they fall on the serious and the delirious alike. They fall on the connected and the unhinged alike…” - President Bill Clinton (April, 2010)
Personally, I have no tolerance for intolerance… Which is why I invite Matt Kibbe to kiss my pimply ass.
Coming Soon: Dick Armey’s Army of Dicks
I’m no pundit or political activist, obviously, so lets close this bloated blog post with some Darjeeling humor!
To celebrate my LOVE of ALL ethnicities, sexualities, genders; my belief in a woman’s right to choose, a gay/lesbian/transgender couple’s right to marry, an Atheists right to seek office; an impetuous actor/voice over guy’s right to leave a voicemail message – I give you my Tea Bagger Boogie Video, constructed from FreedomWorks followers who left me voice mails (though I will not identify anyone nor list their phone numbers – that would be kinda sleazy and illegal):
[UPDATE 5/18/10 1:00 am]
For those too tired to read another blog post in the Tea Bag Saga, we help you skip to the crowning video response to the media attention:
And the media appearances:
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For a follow-up to these events, see the following posts:
Cleaning Up After the Circus
and the viral PSA video finale
Mea Culpa. A PSA For Tea Party Critics.
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[UPDATE 4/21/10 6:00 pm]
A Response To Matt Kibbe 4/21/10 Follow-Up Post:
Matt Kibbe posted a response on his biggovernment blog where he essentially uses my same argument for calling them in the first place. He just couldn’t take another insulting phone call. However, he doesn’t explain the blacklisting tactic. He goes on to summarize:
Americans covet our freedom of speech. We have a sacred right, enshrined in the Constitution, to show up, protest and challenge government policies that are bad for America.
Matt, please explain to your followers how what you did to me furthers those goals. They deserve true leadership, not cynical Washingtonian manipulation.
By the way, Matt, I have heard from a tremendous amount of your followers and what they’ve said and written to me is far beyond the pale of what I did. However, I did get three emails from true Tea Party members. They disagreed with what I did, but found your actions reprehensible. I believe they represent the part of the Tea Party that needs to upend you and Dick Armey. Take back our nation? I think they need to take back their Tea Party.

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Voice Over Services:
More Words From My Arse:
- Political Voice Overs Revisited
- Cleaning Up After The Circus
- Mea Culpa. A PSA For Tea Party Critics.
- Love Letter To My GEICO Campaign














Thoroughly pathetic. I do hope someone comes along that can offer you legal support to go after these asses. It's pitiful and ridiculous that they felt the need to go after you and Geico because you felt the need to express yourself, regardless of vulgarity or lack thereof. I greatly admire the fact that you remain true to your ideals (and I like 'em!) and aren't afraid to vocalize them in times like these. Just wish the outcome hadn't been as shitty. Best of luck, and know that we're behind you 110%.
Hey Sarah, perhaps his right to speak his mind is at least equal to the tea party people speaking theirs. As far as killers go well does the name Dr. Amy Bishop or Bill Ayers mean anything to you? Perhaps you should read more and talk less. I will enlighten you and Lance or Doug or whomever he is calling himself these days. Dr. Bishop was an avowed communist and adamant Obama supporter who killed three of her fellow alumni in Alabama. Bill Ayers set bombs because he didn't agree with the government and ended up killing a cop who had a family. Way to go Sarah –it seems you and fellow liberals only respect your freedom and no one else's. Funny how tolerance is not tolerated by the leftists if their views aren't the ones being espoused.
The Tea Party has the right to speak their mind, but to call the company he works for and cause him to be removed from the campaign is uncalled for. In a sense, they are attacking his career because of his personal views. Calling him back and countering the voice mail he left is somewhat understandable, but calling GEICO over this matter is just too extreme of a response.
I've used Freedomworks to email my reps from time to time, but reading this makes me upset on hand but on the other, glad that I've not donated to their organization. Seeing as they're focusing on small time bullying rather than actual progress/media outlets, I doubt I will ever donate. I hope this is the last time you have to deal with them.
Mr. Douglas, you and I are on opposite ends of the spectrum politically but I don't believe ANYONE should be targeted or persecuted for enjoying their freedom of speech. I'll try to spread your message to whomever will listen, and I'll let Geico know that non-fascists shop for insurance too. Sorry you have a pimply ass.
Troy Duran
These people…just.. *headdesk*. I've blogged about this and posted the link in a few places where I know I have many friends who are fans of you (and certainly are not fans of the Tea Baggers).
Unbelievable how they can use all the slurs they want but if anyone uses one on them they get up in arms like a bunch of middle-schoolers.
Best wishes for however this turns out.
Wait for it….
You'll be starring on Faux Noise any minute now. It is, after all, the Teabaggin' Network.
With all my love,
AUnty Em
When one lacks facts, they resort to name calling. Nicely done AUnty Em!
Ha ha, good for the little Gecko and FreedomWorks!
You attacked a conservative American organization. You called the members of it mentally retarded and insinuated that some affiliated with it would kill eventually. You deserve to be put out of business. I will also make it a point to ensure that, until you apologize for your comment, every company you do work for is boycotted.
You really think it's fair to do this to someone just for exercising free speech, just as you tea baggers do? The organization illegally recorded him and gave out his phone number without permission. They should have simply ignored his phone complaint instead of taking it so far. Grow up.
You do not understand the constitutional concept of free speech. You seem to be enthralled with your own sense of humor but calling the TPM tea-baggers is not subtle or clever or funny. It is simply adolescent. If you want to add a little context to your whining how about posting your actual voice-mail, unedited? btw…there has not been one shred of evidence to support your claims that members of the TPM used any derogatory terms against any member of Congress at the Washington event. Don't let that stop you from repeating the claim though…good little liberals should never let the truth ruin a good whine.
Although I disagree with this man's political belief's, he does not "deserve to be put out of business." His career and his political views are separate things. Just because you don't agree with someone's opinions, doesn't mean you have the right to call the company he's working for and get him removed from the job.